Surprise Surprise
While all you cliche suckers were watching the parade today, I pretended it was 1992 and caught up on some “Real World” episodes. (What else was I supposed to do with the last day of my 5 day weekend, really?). And quite surprisingly, I did not regret it.
If anything, The Real World : Brooklyn is somewhat a return to the past seasons from the early 90s. Somewhere between the Hawaii and Las Vegas seasons, the producers decided to use people who looked like porn stars, and as one would assume, the idea of “people start getting real” turned into people just getting naked, drunk, sexed up, and bitchy. As that happened, ratings slowly plummeted to the point where even I, as a guilty pleasure tv fanatic couldn’t possibly tell you anything about past recent seasons. Apparently, sex may sell for a little while, but why settle for the blurred out cable tv version of it?
It’s taken producers nearly a decade to catch on to this, and they finally returned to its roots. Some things have been switched up, as the show now has 8, not 7, cast members. And, on a whole, the people look normal for the 18-24 yr old range. Even the girl who aspires to be a dancer is portrayed as a cutie, not a sexpot. And going past looks to story lines, although I only watched for a half hour or so, there seemed to be many good issues afoot, among my favorites being the transgendered cast member and one guy asking “Why is it that we are so open-minded about certain people, but not about fraternity guys?” (which I think is a very good topic as the majority of people who refer to themselves as open-minded will shoot you a dirty look if your facebook profile political views don’t say “liberal”).
Anyway, if you find yourself bored on a Saturday afternoon of “Dirty Dancing” on TNT, I suggest for once to click over to MTV and see if RW:BK is on. 
They’re Stealing My Idea!
According to the word of God, aka PerezHilton.com, MTV is looking into doing a Hills type TV show in Washington, DC.
Well, well, isn’t that funny, I suggested that how many months ago…
Note: If any MTV producers happen to stumble upon this lil page of mine, please please please, feel free to contact me about being on this show. I’m looking for any excuse to drop out of law school these days. I will lose weight, dye my hair blond, and even go by a fake name if necessary. Need me to pretend to work at a glamorous job? Will do. Anything it takes. xoxo, anastasia.
File This One Away With the Rest
The reality television show trend continues…
First, it was Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey.
Next, Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro split.
Then, Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler called it quits. [They've gotten back together and separated more times than I can count, but bear with me.]
While all these reality television show couples ended in divorce, they all went in front of the cameras while still newlyweds. When Mr. and Mrs. Hulk Hogan let VH1 cameras into their lives, they had been married for two decades. Nevertheless, they were swept into the trend. Linda Bollea filed for divorce against Hulk Hogan this holiday weekend.
And did she tell him beforehand? No. Hulk didn’t find out until a newspaper reporter called him. How sad.
Reality shows are bad for your love life.
Shot Through The Heart
As made clear by numerous posts on such half hour of bliss delights like “The Hills”, I love awful television. Love it. Now, when my dear friend who usually teases me about my guilty pleasures suggested “A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila”, I mentally balked at the idea.
Two Reasons:
A) I don’t like MySpace whores. For your information, there are two types of MySpace whores. 1) The type that have hundreds or thousands or millions of “friends” they have never met. 2) The type that stage amateur pornography shoots to get the sexiest and most scandalous default photo. Tila Tequila not only qualifies as both of these two types, homegirl made a career out of it.
B) Finding love on an MTV or VH1 reality show is about as easy as finding one’s true love in the line outside MisShapes. You have the most egotistical, self-centered people just dying for attention.
I may have been skeptical with my approach towards the show, but I nonetheless approached it. Nothing to make me feel better about my life choices than to watch how others make poor choices in their lives. Honestly, I was curious. And we all know what curiosity does to the cat.
The premises of the show is that Tila Tequila is a bisexual looking for love. So she first meets sixteen straight guys and narrows it down to eleven that she wants to move into her MTV house so that she can see if any of them is the one for her. Before they move in though, she meets with sixteen lesbians and chooses eleven to also move into her fake house. The catch? The straight men thought she was a straight woman, and the lesbians thought she only liked her girls. Drama ensues. The straight men are either scared of lesbians or treat them like a sex object, “you girls gonna make out now?“. The lesbians basically hate men in general. One of them even said in such an eloquent manner, “It’s kinda messed up, it’s messed up just to introduce these guys. It’s kinda, like, a betrayal, in a sense.”
It is a bit odd to step back and think of how many years of reality television where people are looking for love, and this truly is the first show of its kind. I don’t want to give these people credit by saying they’re breaking down barriers, but the show forces us to think about a lot of the judgments we have about others. And the great minds at MTV decided to make all contestants vying for their shot at love to sleep in the same bed. That’s right. One gigantic bed for eleven straight men and eleven lesbians. It should make for a really interesting time.
If anything, the show is a promise for loads of drama. The premiere ended with a snip-it showing clips from the upcoming season. It was basically a thirty second long concentration of every human emotion. Desire, love, friendship, hatred, jealousy, despair, rejection, violence, sex, and tears all somehow made their way in and will play out for the rest of the season. With all that intensity, maybe it is my kind of show after all.
i’m guilty. but it’s a pleasure.
I’m in law school. And as demanding as it is, I still have my priorities. And those priorities include crappy television.
To curb some of the bills, I don’t pay for cable or internet. This post is brought to you in part by a generous neighbor known only as “linksys”. This dear mystery friend of mine lets me research law cases, chat with old friends, keep in touch with my imaginary celebrity friends via tmz, and watch crappy tv online. At this point, I would also like to thank the generous people at MTV for putting all of their episodes of “The Hills” online within hours of airing on their cable network. It gives me something to look forward to on Tuesday afternoons.
[Anyone in for creating a show called "The Hill"? I've got some pretty girl friends. We don't do much during the week. Studying at Washington College of Law is only a little less glamorous than working at Teen Vogue. Pentagon City is the new Rodeo Drive. 5 Guys has as much paparazzi as Koi. Local 16 the new Les Deux. Let me know.]
So after working hard on Tuesday, I treat myself to Monday’s episode of “The Hills”. It’s about twenty minutes of guilty pleasure. But Wednesday is another story. A three hour long explosion of guilty pleasures to escape my sweat pants and gigantic backpack lifestyle.
8- 9 PM America’s Next Top Model. Pure genius. Tyra Banks may be crazy. But this show works. Pretty girls, pretty clothes, the occasional pretty boy, and drama. I can not ask for more.
9 – 10 PM Gossip Girl. I became addicted this weekend. We will see if I can avoid it this week. Pretty girls, pretty clothes, pretty boys, and drama.
10-11PM Project Runway. This season does not technically debut until next week. Pretty girls, pretty clothes, the occasional pretty boy, and drama.
Hump Day? More like Lump Day. My love for the fashionable life will make me a lump on the couch for three hours straight. The irony.
It’s Happening Before Our Eyes
Coming straight after yesterday’s post on Spencer Pratt’s White House aspirations, this photo was posted today on TMZ.
They’re already training to get the right look of a first couple.
I can see their policies now… He will fight terror by spreading rumors that Osama Bin Laden made a sex tape with a Jewish boy, and Heidi will allow for socialized health care to cover breast implants for any girl who was teased in high school.
So much for the free world. We are all doomed.
From Reality Joke to President?
Woof.
In an interview with Radar magazine, Spencer Pratt tells the world he wants to one day go into politics. Pretty admirable for a guy whose current career is looking like an idiot on MTV and ruining the lives of others.
Don’t you worry that your fights today will affect your future?
Well, I definitely want to go into politics later in my life. I plan to be governor at least, and president if possible. But if people look back on the show, I’ll say, who were you when you were 23 years old? Don’t tell me you didn’t go to the nightclub and get in fights with your girlfriend and throw paint on the wall. It’s not going to affect my politics and things I want to change. It’s going to be about who I want to be and not who I was when I was 20.
Sorry, Spencer, you could find the cure for cancer, and you would still be known as that ugly kid who acted like a catty 14 year old girl on MTV in order to be a semi-household name.
Sure, Arnold Schwarzenegger is now a governor, but his work in front of the camera includes nice weight lifting videos, one of the best action movies of all time, and a few kid friendly films as well. Spencer Pratt just likes making twenty-something girls cry and convincing his girlfriend to get a boobjob.
On second thought, he is a total money-grubbing dirtball who will do anything to climb to the top. He loves attention, has a shady past, can put on awful apparently fake charm, has no problem calling out those opposing him, enjoys making enemies as well as professional connections, and thinks he has the solution for everything. Maybe he would be perfect for the job.
Cute matching shirts, by the way.
Ja Rule Knows How to Save America, Y’all!
And apparently it’s all about those ho-mo-sex-uals on MTV. In a recent interview with Complex magazine, he states:
“We need to go step to MTV and Viacom, and lets talk about all these fucking shows that they have on MTV that is promoting homosexuality, that my kids can’t watch this shit. Dating shows that’s showing two guys or two girls in mid-afternoon. Let’s talk about shit like that! If that’s not fucking up America, I don’t know what is.”
Yes, Mr. Rule. It’s not terrorists. It’s not war. It’s those queer boys who go on Room Raiders, Next, and Date My Mom. Before you know it, in smalltown playgrounds across America, little boys will be kissing each other and then saying “I’m sorry, but you’re not my type – NEXT!”. Little girls will be going through each others underwear drawers hoping to find something naughty. Before you know it, America will be doomed. It’s okay, we will run to Europe. They don’t put sex on tv over there…. Here they come! Save yourselves!
See that? Gay TV = U.S. Tanks and Helicopter Gunships Pounding Shiites! Ja Rule knows what he is talking about!
Come to think of it…. wasn’t Ja Rule in The Fast and The Furious? Talk about gay entertainment.
