I love my gossip, and since I am a woman, I by nature love magazines. So whenever I find myself at a roadstop in south Jersey during my 5 hour pilgrimage, I peruse and occasionally purchase a nice healthy magazine oozing from cover to cover with dirty rumors and makeup ads. My magazine of choice was always US Weekly.

While People Magazine is probably the most respected out of the celeb mags, it always had this hint of elitism to it. While other magazines saw the beginning downward spiral of Britney’s career, People would have a cover story “Inside Brit and Kev’s Dream Wedding! The Dress! The Flowers! The I Do’s!”. People also adds to its credibility with stories about normal people. How thoughtful. If I wanted to know about real people, I would turn on Maury Povich. That being said, I stuck to my US Weekly faithfully.

Until now.

Enter this week’s cover:

I know the fine print is hard to read, so all I can say is you’re missing out on a lot. Apparently she loves “Sex and the City” and never misses one of her daughters’ recitals. Which is why Barack loves her. You know what I want to read? Whether or not she really loves this country. Yknow, the same country that gave her Affirmative Action so she could attend Princeton University for undergrad and Harvard University for law school. The same country that gives her husband a paycheck so she can afford $800 shoes. You know what else I want to read? Her husband’s response to this. I would put aside my gossip columns for a few minutes just to read that.

Never again will I pay $4.25 for that magazine. You have my word. Xoxo.

And, yet, the masses are swayed anyway.  Have to love democracy.