and i’m caught in between.
Fans rejoiced when the sounds of Britney Spears’s new single 3 filled their ears with fun, high energy dance beats. Then Britney posted some steamy photos from her video shoot. And then the video was posted and any hopes of a dance video were slashed post haste.
Instead of giving a dance video like we haven’t seen since 2002, 3 gives us more lackluster wiggling similar to the “If U Seek Amy” video. And like “Circus” (which was spectacular for many reasons none of which involve dance moves), this video has nice product placement in the beginning with a B.S. fragrance. Seriously though, watching the dance moves in 3 with the horizontal stripper pole reminded me of my last trip to a strip club where I thought to myself “girls, we pay you to dance not just move your hips while standing next to and holding on to a pole with your hand”. Yes, Camelot. Can someone please solve the mystery of where Britney’s dance ability went? I’m sure someone is willing to pay an award. And while at it, figure out why the video has censored the word sin in the phrase “living in sin is the new thing” when it isn’t censored for radio and isn’t even an expletive? Thanks. Xoxo.
Her skin does look glorious though in this video, I must say.
let me give you everything you need. please.
I guess it’s a sign of growing up that all the love songs I listened through my late adolescence are starting to make sense.
This week : “Cold Cold Water” by Mirah.
There’s a bright one that caught your fancy eye, but it’s okay so long as you stay mine. I’m so number one that it’s a shame, a shame, that you let other numbers in the game.
Why I Love Her
Although the theme of crazy bitches has been close to my heart recently, I do love Lily Allen’s new video for “Who’d Have Known” more than I can really say.
Little known fact – my dad looks like Elton John. Although this is an obvious reference to their public spats, this video makes me giddy inside.
Reason #7,355,423,244 to Hate Law School
Ryan Gosling is in DC tonight on tour with his band Dead Man’s Bones. Shirley Manson, lead singer of Garbage and one of my all-time faves, wrote a blog post earlier this week on how awesome their song “Pa Pa Power” is, and I have to say, I do agree with her. Although Federal Courts take home midterm takes priority over eye candy, I am enjoying listening to them from my little work station in my little studio apartment.
it’s not fair, and i think you’re really mean.
Lily Allen, one of my dear favorites, has made it clear, much to my displeasure, that she has no contract for a new album and would like to retire asap to make babies. My heart is broken as one of my favorite singers would rather be a breeder. Although I can put my own selfish demands aside, I think there is something interesting in one of her quotes on the subject.
“People think I’m this super-confident person who’s all for female empowerment but it’s not true. I have every intention of becoming a suburban mum. I want to get married and have children. Being followed by the paparazzi is not a life I want.”
If one has listened to a single song of Allen’s it’s plainly obvious that she is definitely not super-confident (check out “Cheryl Tweedy” about one of my faves in Girls Aloud), but female empowerment? Perhaps I missed the boat and need to read Jezebel more, but isn’t the entire point of feminism is the ability to choose? I’ve always been under the impression that a woman can be a stay-at-home mom and wear pearls and makeup and still be a feminist, so long as they do it out of their own volition. Perhaps I’m jaded from my own childhood (although mom did not wear pearls or makeup), but I don’t think a desire to care for your offspring fulltime is against feminist ideals.
I also have to wonder why more female celebs don’t take this route. Most of us have those baby-making hormones kicking in, and the natural urge to protect offspring (from the dangers of paparazzi, drugs, etc) and since these women make enough money to live comfortably for the rest of their lives, I have to wonder why more of them don’t retire and find a mountain resort. Maybe women do have the career drive more than simple anthropology would suggest. Or perhaps it’s just that the women who succeed in entertainment industries require such a drive to reach that success so they would not normally cease to have that drive after a fetus slides out of the womb.
I just hope Miss Lily puts a studio in her home and keeps me supplied with her witty songs for a long time.
v.
I’ve already delved into the subject of the homogenous monogamous monster in a prior past. Having long ago decided that I, after mentally playing with the thought, could not accept a nonmonogamous relationship have not given much thought to the subject.
However, I find myself in a lonely hotel room listening to the romantic love song “All I See” by Kylie Minogue, a worldwide phenomenon barely known in the United States. Her album X (her tenth) had a bonus version featuring those rappers MIMS who dropped off the face of the earth after “This Is Why I’m Hot” played at all the college parties in Spring 2007. During the middle of this oh so pretty love song (the dj’s got me feeling the way i did when i first met you), one of these db’s goes into a rap about cheating on his woman. WTF? And just like that all of these thoughts come flooding back.
and no, i wont stop the cheating some of you are like “damn, he’s a demon” but let me share with y’all the meaning, i mean i’d rather lie with the one i love but i still harbor my own selfish reasons.
well, don’t that just warm your heart? perhaps theyre being honest and i’m the one with the delusions and will end up being cheated on when I hit middle age. are the wives of gene simmons and snoop dogg more in touch with reality than i am by acknowledging that theyre partners have sexual needs but are not upset by it since they know they are the woman he still comes home to. or is it the nice credit card and house and jewelry and children and bragging rights that has them overlooking those unfortunate flaws of their husband? either way, it’s a sick testament to human nature and i’m not particularly a fan.
True Story
In a car with my parents and not-so-little sister when talking about a seventeen year-old girl who drank too much at a family party this weekend…
Mom: I just don’t understand why people get so shit-faced.
Me: I learned my lesson March 2007 when I got so sick I had to leave a bar and ten minutes after I left, Ryan Gosling went to that bar. I have not overdrank since that night.
Sister: Where were Kate and the eight kids that night? Guess you missed your chance with the only Asian member of the Hair Care for Men Club.
Me: Ryan Gosling, you idiot! Ryan Gosling! The Notebook!
Unrelated to Previous Post
If anyone can tell me where I can legally download in the US, and yes, I will pay for it, Girls Aloud’s “The Loving Kind”? I’ve been looking for it for agesss. And, yes, I’m in tears thinking about a whole years without any new Girls Aloud music. Kills me inside after today’s news that one of their members (can’t keep ‘em straight, kill me) is taking time off to pursue acting. Snore.
“I wish my life was a little less seedy, why am I always so greedy, wish I looked just like Cheryl Tweedy. I know I never will, I know I never will.” Lily Allen.
Ask and Ye Shall Receive.
I’m alright, don’t feel sorry ’cause it’s true – when I’m gone, you realize I’m the best thing to happen to you. You always love me more miles away. Miles Away.Madonna
And while that might be the most relevant breakup song of the moment, I give you, dear readers, my favorite breakup songs of all time.
1) Shit On The Radio.Nelly Furtado (The “I Just Realized How Much Better I Am Than You” Slow Song)
I remember the days when I was so eager to satisfy you and be less than I was to prove I could walk beside you. And now that I’ve flown away, you curse the day I decided to stay true to myself.
2) Brand New Man.Letter Kills (The Happy Dance Song When You Know The Other Person Is Gonna Be Hurt by a New Person)
I can’t complain, I just walked away and took more steps towards being safe. Baby, you just bought yourself a brand new man.
3) Don’t Bother.Shakira (The Sad Song About When They Date Someone Better Than You)
For you, I would give up all I own and move to a communist country, if you came with me of course. And I’d file my nails so they don’t hurt you, lose those pounds, learn about futbol… if it made you stay. But you won’t. But you won’t.
4) I Could Say.Lily Allen (The Song About How Happy You Are Now)
Since you’ve gone, I’ve lost that chip on my shoulder. Since you’ve gone, I feel like I’ve grown older. Now you’re gone, it’s as if the whole wide world is my stage. Now you’ve gone, it’s like I’ve been let out of my cage.
5) Happy Without You.Annie (The Song That Makes You Believe You Are Happy Because It Says That Line Over And Over Again)
And while we’re on the subject, here’s an extra gift:
“Love isn’t supposed to be easy. Easy don’t make you grow, easy doesn’t make you learn, easy doesn’t make you think. I thank God every day for giving me a man whom makes me think.” Madonna on Guy Ritchie, 2004.
You’re The Realest Thing I Know, Hands Down.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey.
1) Two are not housewives.
2) They have the most annoying accents that I did not know were accents for the first twenty years of my life.
3) Yes, I know their town.
4) I recently met a second cousin of one of the show’s housewives. Since the show has aired, people have sent him facebook messages to ask whether they are related. He responds, “Yes” and that’s it.
5) It’s the only show of all the Housewives where I actually follow the season. Atlanta had my attention for about two episodes and Orange County and New York bored me within five minutes.
6) I do find all of the women have some very redeeming qualities. But all their other qualities make them totally horrific personalities.
7) Since when does seven episodes make a season? I guess the obligatory reunion show makes eight, but c’mon, did Bravo keep production short in the event that the show wasn’t a hit? Everything out of New Jersey, if not admired, is at the very least watched. (Garden State, True Life : I Have a Summer Share, et cetera et cetera et cetera…)
Watch the season finale. There will be a table thrown.
